One of the truly wonderful things about having kids and becoming a parent is the authenticity you get to experience when engaging with your kids.  Yes, kids lie, that’s true.  But, ask a child if she likes the dinner you’ve plated, that’s based on some new recipe, and you’ll know the truth.  Ask an adult the same question and you’ll be met with a very politically correct answer.  Well, unless of course, you ask me

Christmas is one of those occasions where we seem to always try and out do one another, keep up with the Jones’ and impress with labels. Labels, you ask? Yes, labels. We’re all guilty of it, even I am. Under the Kmiec tree this year, there was no Louis, Jimmy or Tory.  Nada on the Prada, MK and Hermes.  Sorry, not a single item from Armani, Versace or Gucci – yes, we avoided the holy trinity. No Christian, Coach or Coco. Also, I must confess, there was no Lexus under the tree either.

Now, mind you, this is no assault on the wealthy, chic or stylish.  Without the label segment, we wouldn’t have people to gawk at, velvet ropes to envy and of course nothing to lust for.  And this isn’t me being above such items or brands.  I’m the first person to encourage purchasing 1 quality purse over 50 cheap ones.  Ditto on shoes, watches and umbrellas (trust me on this one).

No, this is more about the observation that kids don’t care what’s in the box, what the label is on the gift or the logo they’ll be displaying. And with good reason…they couldn’t tell you the difference between Coach and and Couch.  If anything they care more about the wrapping paper…or rather the joy of unwrapping their present. They’re equally as satisfied with 1 gift as they are with 100.  Seriously. I’ve watched this up close for 4+ years now.  It’s a really amazing thing to witness.  Honestly, it leaves me wanting to be as genuinely label disinterested as they are.  But, alas, though I’ve witnessed this authenticity and I’m a marketer, even I fall prey to label love…but I’m getting better!

There wasn’t a single present under the tree for me.  That’s what happens when you become a dad!  The likelihood your 4 year old is going to hop in the car, visit the mall and pick you a present that she paid for with her credit card…is…well…unlikely.  But, what I did get this Christmas was something much better than any company could provide:

I got to see those smiles and feel the real Christmas magic that we yearn for after watching a movie like Love Actually. Besides, if they were wearing a label it would say my name anyhow

I just got back from spending 6 days in Disney World with the kids and the ex-wife. You might be scratching your head about “ex-wife” so let me explain. Cheryl, my ex, and I get along great. Unlike most divorces, there’s no hate, animosity or awkwardness. We’re two people that are great friends and realized we shouldn’t be married. Believe me, I know I’m blessed. When we were getting divorced we agreed that Disney was something we wanted to do together with the kids. I you’ve ever been to Disney then you know how monumental of an event your first visit is. Visiting Disney isn’t so much a trip or a vacation, as it is an experience. From how you tell the kids they’re going to Disney, to the costumed characters, to the themed rides, to the parades and fireworks…oh yes, it’s an experience.

We were blessed with great weather throughout. The sun was out every single day and the temperature was consistently between 68 and 82 degrees. In short, it was exactly what you’d want it to be. We agonized over when to visit and finally settled on early November. This was definitely the right decision. The parks were rarely crowded which meant the was it times for the rides were short.

Over 6 days we covered Magic Kingdom, Epcot, Animal Kingdom and Hollywood Studios. I think 6 days was a day too long, but the price for passes was actually cheaper than a 5 day trip. Crazy. We spent most of our trip at Magic Kingdom and Epcot; Animal Kingdom and Hollywood Studios were each 1/2 day experiences. There’s so much to see and experience; you never felt like you were repeating anything.

John and Cora had a blast. I was so proud of my kids. From how well they were behaved relative to other kids to how adventurous they were. For example, Cora rode the Kilimanjaro roller coaster at Animal Kingdom, TWICE, The Tower of Terror, Thunder Mountain and Test Track. Not bad for a 4 year old.

Of course the kids also wanted to see and visit with the characters. Over 6 days they met with: Pluto, Mickey, Minnie, Flick, Pinnochio, Daisy, Donald, Goofy, Aurora, Belle, Cinderella, Peter Pan, Tinkerbell, Tigger, Whinnie The Poo, Buzz, Woody, Mike, Sully, Chip and Dale. Crazy, right? John even got a kiss from Tinkerbell!

I can’t say enough about how amazing the Disney staff were. There was always a smile and a bounce in their step. You don’t realize how impressive this is until you head to the airport and interact with the surly and grumpy TSA staff. Disney proves that you can operationalize core values to each and every employee. The only nit I have with the Disney experience is how poor the food was…which could be overlooked if it weren’t so expensive. Hey, no one’s perfect. There’s not much I’d change about the experience. I’m really happy that Cheryl and I were able to give our kids a life time of memories.

Here’s a few photos from the trip all taken with my Nikon D700:

John playing the drums at Animal Kingdom

Cinderella’s Castle

Cora after getting her face painted

John driving a car (I can’t even describe the laughter and pure enjoyment he had driving this car)

A caricature of the kids

Me with Tinkerbell

An earlier version of this post exists here.  I’ve since updated it with new information, perspective and thoughts.

I’m certainly one of the lucky ones.  I’m still here today.  I flew, I landed and made it home.  I went on to get married (eventually divorced), have two amazing children, love again and make a life.  I was fortunate, no one I knew suffered any tragedy that morning.  This has always stopped me in my tracks.  The majority of my family lives in or works in New York.  To escape that horrible day, otherwise unscathed, is a miracle.

Frankly, when I look back on September 11, 2011 I marvel at the events.  That morning, I left the house, kissed my girlfriend (she’d later go on to be my wife) goodbye and got into a cab headed for Midway airport.  I boarded a Southwest flight from Midway airport with my great friend and colleague Reed Roussel. We were both headed to Ft. Knox Kentucky for a full day worth of meetings with our United States Army client. When we landed in Kentucky, the first plane had already met its fate by flying directly into the twin towers.

We were oblivious to everything that had transpired as we hopped into our Enterprise rental car and started the 45 minute trek to Ft. Knox. During the ride over, little did we know, plane #2 had also crashed. This was 2001 and cell phones weren’t exactly in high use or even reaching mass adoption levels. The behavior of having it practically glued to your hand just didn’t exist. I did notice a call from my wife and Reed noticed a call from his mom, but we ignored them both.  Cell reception in the Ft. Knox, Kentucky area was spotty and we didn’t want to incur the wrath of roaming charges.  They were well aware of the tragedy and were trying to reach us to make sure we were both OK.  I’m still amazed that their calls made it through.  If you remember, nearly everyone was receiving the “all circuits are busy” message that morning and throughout the day.

When we arrived at the post, there was something off. The vibe was all wrong. An hour into our visit (55 minutes of which were spent waiting for the client) we finally learned from our client that 2 planes had flown into the twin towers and it was to our “advantage” that we leave the post immediately. Why? Because, in about 10 minutes the post would be on lock down and all non-military personnel would be placed “under suspicion.” To be honest, we were still confused about the situation, but we had no desire to be locked up on the post.

Reed and I hopped in the car, called the airline, learned all flights were canceled, then called Enterprise and explained we would not be returning the car to the airport. Instead, we would be driving to Chicago and returning it there. If I remember correctly, she informed us there would be a incremental $150 charge, or so, since we hadn’t intended to return the vehicle out of state.  The fee was irrelevant, we just wanted to get home to see our families.  So, we hung up the phone and started the journey from Ft. Knox to Chicago. The roads were strangely empty. Keep in mind, at this point, while the rest of the country was transfixed to the television coverage, we hadn’t seen anything. With no smartphones, our only real option was the radio. The irony, was, the only radio station that was coming through was the one carrying Howard Stern. Crazy, right?  There was no XM, no Sirius, no internet streaming, just your FM/AM tuner.  That meant for the next 2 hours we listened to Howard Stern. He was our connection to the outside world and was the one who brought us up to speed on what had happened. It wasn’t till we stopped for lunch, that we saw our first visual. We were awe struck. Stunned. It’s hard to put into words the emotions running thorough me. I’m a born and raised New Yorker; this hit hard.

I’ve always traveled for work.  It’s just part of the job.  But, travel for me changed after 9/11. I paid more attention to my surroundings.  When someone got up to go to the bathroom, I stopped what I was doing and took notice.  Those were simple things. They were things that I think many of us did.  But, what really changed for me was something that I still do to this day.  I make sure to let the ones I love know I’m leaving…I try to call them, just to hear their voice…just in case.  And…I always let those loved ones know I landed…same thing, I try to connect live if I can….though these days, I rely on text messaging because of convenience.  You value the people who matter the most to you, just a little more, when you realize that flights aren’t as routine as we’d like to think they are.

10 years ago, I learned about 9/11 via the radio. I learned about operation Desert Storm via television. When Sadam Hussein was captured, I learned about it via the web. The death of Osama Bin Laden was shared with me via text message first, then Twitter. The text message I received instructed me to check out Twitter, not turn on the TV. After reading the news, I found a TV and saw the president’s speech. As I watched his delivery, I couldn’t help but think about how we’ve evolved as a society…how our sharing has changed…how our means for connection have evolved. We operate in a real time and always on demand society. I think this was the first real moment where that wasn’t just rhetoric, for me, but a truly shared experience.

I’m so thankful for technology and how it’s evolved…how simple it’s made keeping in touch with those who matter most.  Texting, Facebook, foursquare…hell, even the ability to simply make a phone call from anywhere; these are all things we take for granted, not unlike the people in our lives who matter the most.  A good friend of mine shared this with me via twitter last year:

Life is largely fleeting. A series of momentary intersections with other people. It is truly incredible to find someone of permanence.

My experience on 9-11 reminds me of that concept every day.

Webster says “the quality or disposition of receiving and treating guests and strangers in a warm, friendly, generous way” is how to describe the word hospitality. I tend to think of it as making visitors feel like they belong. This isn’t an easy task. I’ve been on the receiving end of some poor hospitality. Have you ever had one of those visits where you just feel like you’re a bother? As if the people hosting you clearly preferred you weren’t there?

Basically, think of that famous scene in Pretty Woman when Julia Roberts walks into the store, armed with cash and ready to shop, but the staff looks down on her and suggests she shop elsewhere. Well I have experienced that kind of hospitality (in-stores and at-homes) and it’s not fun.

Growing up my grandmother, her sister and my mom amazed me with how generous, warm and yes…hospitable they were. Paraphrasing my grandmother’s eulogy, there was always another seat to be had at the table, another glass that could be filled and more rice to be spared. That’s just the way things were and still are, in my family. I’d probably also add, there’s always a floor, bed or couch to sleep on/in and someone to pick you up from the airport. Again, that’s just the way my family does things.

This past July 4th weekend I was given a taste of hospitality that was wonderfully reminiscent of my own family. From the get go I just had a feeling these were “good people” as my dad sometimes says. They offered to pick up and drop off from the airport, asked what I’d like to drink ahead of the trip (lots of pepsi in the fridge!), took me for a tour of the island, provided keys to the house as needed and access to their bikes, took an interest in my interests and even let a friend of mine “crash” the party at the last minute.

That’s all well and good. It makes for a nice list. But, the true testament for how wonderful the hospitality was, is how I felt throughout the weekend. It simply felt like I fit. That’s a hard feeling to create. I’m so thankful to have met these wonderful people.

I know it sounds like I’m gushing and this is a little over the top. But, if you had been here in Ocean City at this house, with these people, you’d be doing the same. Creating a sense of hospitality is not easy. Retailers like Tiffany’s and Barney’s have mastered this art. And, so have these people. I can’t wait to come back.

Shot on slide Film (Fuji Velvia 50) circa 2002 and with a non-digital SLR (Nikon F5), this is an all time favorite of mine. Many of us will be grilling today, having a beer and enjoying the company of friends and family. I know I will. But, beyond the fun, let’s take some time to remember those who gave us this holiday and who continue selflessly keeping us safe and free. Hope your 4th is filled with fun, sun, family and a cold beverage.

I’m sure I made many gifts like this for my dad, over the years. Cora made this one for me at school and then updated it right in front of me after I unwrapped it. It was as funny and perplexing as it sounds. I will be proudly displaying this mug and her hand written card on my desk at work, later today.

Technically, the birthday is Wednesday, June 15, 2011, but we decided to celebrate his birthday today.  Great day for the celebration.  In the morning it was roughly 60 degrees and overcast.  While that might not sound like perfect weather, it’s ideal for great photos.  The overcast sky means no harsh shadows or squinty eyes.  We headed over to the baseball field for some early morning photos and this one was easily of my favorites.

The rest of the day was filled with fun.  Great food, family and friends created a very memorable day.  John definitely enjoyed himself and that’s all that really matters.

It’s cliche, but oh so true, they grow up so fast.

This is what Christmas is all about.  It’s not about $600 purses, new cars, jewelry from Tiffany’s, expensive bottles of wine or any other material items.  Nope, this is what makes Christmas amazing…seeing these two faces after they’ve made sure Santa ate some cookies, drank his milk and shared the carrots with Rudolph.

It’s the little things that are the big things.  Merry Christmas.

I always bust out this photo for the 4th of July.  It’s one of my all time favorite shots that I captured.  This was done “old school” on slide Film (Fuji Velvia 50) and a non-digital SLR (Nikon F5).  Sometimes there’s nothing wrong with recycling the past…especially when the colors are this vibrant!  Hope your 4th is as good as mine is going to be.